Piracy Tax

Emergency Alert! Italian netizens' freedoms are under threat from a piracy tax that demands all who use cloud storage to pay a tax even if they did not violate any anti-piracy laws whatsoever! Benito Mussolini's ideology has risen from its grave, and this is a bad omen for Italy and the whole world!

While the world was holding its breath during Operation Epic Fury, which saw the death of Ayatollah Khamenei, and the Iranian Navy suffering its Pearl Harbor moment, resulting in Iran suffering a far worse humiliation that surpassed Operation Midnight Hammer, Italy's copyright regulatory board was imposing a piracy tax on Italian netizens, regardless of whether they violated any anti-piracy laws or not. This is tyranny that would make the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) look like a weak attempt to overtake the European Union's copyright regulations, which it is...

Before the ratification of the so-called Sonny Bono Act that gave rise to the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA), the European Union has always wanted to impose a global copyright regulatory system that many countries tried so hard to comply, but just could not meet its required standards. These copyright standards can be traced back to a 1939 copyright bill that was proposed by the Nazi regime in Germany, but was only ratified in 1965 by the Federal Republic. What the world does not realize is that de-Nazification turned out to be a farce, meaning the Federal Republic of Germany had essentially ratified a copyright regulation that was proposed by the Nazis. This in turn, led to European Union member states such as France and Italy adopting Germany's copyright laws. Even worse still, Germany's copyright offices were run by former Nazis, and it was Germany's copyright offices that came up with the copyright regulations that copyright trolls falsely accuse netizens of violating.

We think the so-called Sonny Bono Act that led to the ratification of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) was a nefarious plot by Hollywood and Disney to expand their property rights. Contrary to popular belief, the DMCA was in reality, a pathetic attempt by the Bill Clinton administration to align America's copyright regulations with the European Union's standards. Those standards, however, had their origins in a 1939 copyright bill that the Nazis proposed, but did not get ratified due to World War 2, and was only passed in the Federal Republic of Germany in 1965.

For those who think Nazism and Fascism died along with Adolf Hitler and Benito Mussolini, they are dead wrong. Revelation 17:8 speaks about a beast that "was, and is not, and yet is". This final resurrection of the Roman Empire is taking over copyright law, and it will have the whole world under its iron grip once more. However, it will meet its doom. First, it will be crippled by a coalition of Communist rogue states, then it will get finished off by the return of Jesus Christ. The Roman Beast that keeps coming back will finally be cast down into the Lake of Fire, and it will die in Hellfire.

Smurf Gets Smacked

Weapons that are about to hit a Smurf: Enchanted Emerald-tipped Mithril Bolt, Bomberman Bomb, Granite Maul, Rune Throwing Knife tipped with Weapon poison(++).

Remember the comic about various characters getting smacked by a Granite Maul? Well, a Smurf is about to get smacked by a Granite Maul. But the Granite Maul isn't the only weapon that is about to hit the Smurf. He's also about to get hit by an Enchanted Emerald-tipped Mithril Bolt, a Rune Throwing Knife (p++) and one of Bomberman's bombs. Looks like this poor Smurf is about to suffer greatly via getting smashed, blasted and poisoned...

Why must this poor Smurf suffer? It's not because of Gargamel's villainy, but it's because of online gaming authorities waging war on Smurf Accounts. The reason for that? Smurf Accounts are a violation of honor codes in various online video games. That's why the Smurf had to suffer.

Smacked By Granite Mauls

Characters that are about to get brutally smacked by a Granite Maul from Runescape: A Mugger from RuneScape, Buddy from Kick the Buddy, Crazy Redd from the Animal Crossing series.

RuneScape's Muggers deserve to die over 9000 times by any means possible for attacking too many low-leveled players. Period.

Buddy from Kick the Buddy getting smacked by a Granite Maul seems to be very normal for a game about bashing a dummy. Nuff said.

Smashing Crazy Redd with a Granite Maul sounds like overkill, but he deserves it for selling fake art to unsuspecting customers throughout the entire history of the Animal Crossing series.

Zelda and Famicom Disk System 40th Anniversary Tribute

Today marks the 40th Anniversary of the Japanese release of the Famicom Disk System and its launch title The Legend of Zelda. Since then, The Legend of Zelda series went from strength to strength to become the colossus it is today.

By the way, the "Thanks A Million" quote was from the Zelda II: The Adventure of Link ending.

Happy 40th Anniversary, The Legend of Zelda and Famicom Disk System!

Nintendo games and characters © Nintendo.

The Father of Sega Consoles

Sad news, Sega fans. Hideki Sato, the father of all of Sega's consoles from the SG-1000 to the Dreamcast, and Sega's honcho from 2001 until 2003, died on the 13th of February, 2026. And it doesn't help that his death happened on a Friday of all days...

What does the Sega SG-1000, the Sega Master System, the Sega Mega Drive/Genesis, the Sega Saturn and the Sega Dreamcast all have in common? Hideki Sato stewarded the design of all of these Sega consoles. He also became Sega's honcho in 2001 when Sega exited hardware production to focus on third-party games for other platforms, and presided over the company until 2003.

If you want to feel old, just remember that Hideki Sato was Sega's honcho during a period when Sega was transitioning from hardware production to third-party publisher.

Modesty Free Pass

Remember, upskirt shots are a violation of modesty. However, skirted leotards and swimsuits get a free pass because leotards and swimwear are outerwear, and the skirt is more of an accessory than a privacy barrier.

For those wondering where the skirted leotard came from, it's from the Wii Party U minigame "Ice Spinners". This ice skating minigame is the only instance where female Miis get to wear an ice skating leotard.

Warzone Goners

Author's Note: All copyrights for the characters in this comic go to their respective owners.

The warzones of Command and Conquer: Red Alert have no place for pathetic weaklings. Here are five weaklings who should never be in such warzones.

France's biggest loser needs no introduction whatsoever. Glass Joe has an abysmal 99 losses according to his lore in the Punch-Out series. If he were to fight in the Red Alert trilogy's version of the Cold War, even a cheap conscript would easily mow him down in personal combat.

As the weakest character in the Street Fighter series, Dan Hibiki was always destined to be weak. He's not as weak as Glass Joe, but still, he will get mowed down by conscripts...

Bubsy's catchphrase of "What could possibly go wrong?" will end up becoming self-fulfilling if this Bobcat were to be fighting in a Cold War gone hot because he will end up angering Soviet Russia's huskies and War Bears, resulting in him getting eaten up by them.

While Spelunker has bombs and an Uzi, these weapons will mean nothing when falling from a height of one meter means instant death. Therefore, Spelunker would be dead if he was to fight in the Red Alert warzones...

Wynn already has too many enemies and hazards that would knock him dead in one hit in his own game. If this fragile protagonist were to be posted to the Red Alert warzones, he would definitely be a goner despite being armed with bombs.

TL;DR, if these weaklings went to the Red Alert warzones, all of them are guaranteed to be goners.