CD-i Tetris

While the Philips CD-i version of Tetris is not as fondly remembered as the Game Boy version or even the NES version due to being one of the worst versions of Tetris in existence, the scenery and music were the redeeming qualities that gave this game a special place in the hearts of video game historians and the Philips CD-i fanbase.

A Note from a Time Traveler

Have you ever had a strange dream where you found one of those notes left behind by time travelers? This note is just one good example. In this case, the time traveler comes from the time after Christ's Second Coming. He had managed to create a time machine to deliver a note to someone from before the Great Tribulation. The note was sent back to the past to deliver a message of hope amid the coming doom and gloom, and it had this to say about a bright future:

1. People will stop arguing about who the true successor to the Roman Empire is because the Roman Empire no longer exists.

2. Tyrannical dictatorships will cease to exist.

3. There will be no more gridlocked democracies.

4. Humanity will observe the Anno Mundi Calendar.

5. There will be no more terrorist attacks against trains.

6. Weapons of war will be converted to farming equipment.

7. Harvests will be so bountiful that the combine harvesters can barely keep up with them.

8. Food quality and flavor will be drastically improved.

9. The very first YouTube video will finally get the grand remake it had been waiting for.

10. Cat videos still rule the Internet.

11. Tetris still remains very popular.

12. All of this and many other good things that are not on the list have been made possible because the Demon King who deceived Adam and Eve at the Garden of Eden had been thrown into the Bottomless Pit.

With all that said, a bright future awaits those who survived the Demon King's tyranny during the Great Tribulation, especially those who used to be the subjects of the dictators and tyrants who opposed Christ when he returned to Earth to prevent it from becoming tohu and bohu.

Even more things that are better than Internet Censorship

Author's Note: Once again, I bring you yet another comic about things I would rather be than to be somebody who censors the Internet for any reason whatsoever. Looks like I really dislike Internet Censorship a lot.

They are not diamonds, but sapphires are definitely something I would like to be. After all they are attractive to ladies as well, especially the sapphires from MapleStory.

Speaking of MapleStory, the strapless one-piece swimsuits that female players can purchase from the Cash Shop are attractive because wearing them makes the female players attractive.

Maron from Astra Superstars is wearing a skimpy attire, and yes, she is wearing a pair of panties as outerwear.

I would prefer to be one of those weapons from the Worms games than to censor the Internet, and one of these weapons is a "pineapple" grenade. At least I could destroy any pawn of Internet Censorship by exploding in their face if I were a grenade. Another weapon from the Worms games would be the land mine. If I were a land mine, I would explode anyone who steps on me. Yet another weapon from the Worms games I would rather be is a dynamite. At least I could blast any pawn of Internet Censorship if I could be deployed against them.

Last but not least, the long line tetromino from Tetris is definitely what I would rather be than to be a pawn of Internet Censorship. The long line has always been the greatest of Tetris pieces because in the right conditions, four rows of blocks get cleared. Maybe I could crush anyone who wants to censor the Internet if I get the chance to do so.

Puyo Puyo Tetris

Author's Note: If you can understand Russian, the comic's title reads "Puyo Puyo Tetris," the Puyo are saying "Puyo Puyo" and the last panel has the word "Splat" spelled in Russian. And yes, this comic was originally created to commemorate the launch of Puyo Puyo Tetris. In other words, well done, Sega. You actually created one of the best Tetris games ever made.

Rejected Tetris Plus Endings

Author's Note: This was originally going to be the very first comic uploaded to Neo Retro Union, back when it was originally going to be called Gamers' Generation. But the name "Gamers' Generation" was already taken, so I chose Neo Retro Union instead.

The arcade version of Tetris Plus has ten different endings for the Puzzle Mode, eight of which are featured in the Standard version of Puzzle Mode. Of course, there may have been proposed versions of the endings that did not make the cut for the final product.

Here are three potential endings that I came up with that did not make the cut for the official version of the game.

Rejected Ending #1: In one of the Standard Puzzle Mode endings, the Professor's Assistant found an ancient bikini among the heap of treasures. For an awkward ending, this would have been a better ending than the ending where the Professor and his Assistant found out that the treasures are fake. Also found in the treasure heap is a magic wand from Rod Land, which, like Tetris Plus, is a Jaleco title that began in the arcade.

Rejected Ending #2: Endings 5 to 8 revolve around the Professor and his Assistant finding a switch. In this rejected ending, the Professor and his Assistant become invisible and cannot see each other. This would have made more sense than the ending where the pyramid turns into a robot.

Rejected Ending #3: Basically the Expert Puzzle Mode ending, but with the Professor's Assistant wearing the bikini from Rejected Ending #1. The final product version of the Expert Puzzle Mode ending arcade version of Tetris Plus had the Professor's Assistant wear a red swimsuit without shoulder straps, which would make more sense than a bikini found among a heap of treasures from an ancient pyramid.

It's disappointing that there is no video footage of the Expert Puzzle Mode of the arcade version of Tetris Plus or the Extra World Levels of Tetris Plus 2's Puzzle Mode. And don't even bother wishing for Tetris Plus 3 because Jaleco closed down when Game Yarou went bankrupt, unless City Connection decides to revive the Tetris Plus series, which is unlikely to happen.

On a related note, please enjoy the Professor's Assistant wearing a gold linen bikini that she found among a heap of ancient treasures.

Update: Sometime around May 2021, somebody actually uploaded video footage of the Expert Puzzle Mode of the arcade version of Tetris Plus, and the ending was featured as well.