PlayStation Museum Articafts

If an actual PlayStation Museum does exist, it would definitely need items from PlayStation's 30-year history. Here are some PlayStation-related items that I believe would have belonged in a PlayStation Museum if such a place exists.

Crime Crackers and its sequel Crime Crackers 2 are forgotten Japan-only games for the PS1. It's a huge shame because Crime Crackers was the very first PS1 game developed and published by Sony Computer Entertainment.

Do you still remember the PS1 and PS2 demo discs that came with various PlayStation magazines? They would definitely be great artifacts for a PlayStation Museum.

If you have played PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale, you would have been familiar with Polygon Man. Before he became the final boss of PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale, he was the original advertiser of Sony's PlayStation. Therefore, PlayStation advertisement posters featuring Polygon Man belong in a PlayStation Museum.

Other artifacts that would be perfect for a PlayStation Museum would include a Gold PlayStation 2, a PocketStation and a Silver PlayStation 2 Slim. While the PocketStation would be an easier find, the Gold PS2 and Silver PS2 Slim are less common and therefore, are harder to find.

While there are lots of PlayStation-related items that will be featured in a PlayStation Museum, these eight items deserve more respect in my opinion. Especially the Crime Crackers games, the PS1 and PS2 demo discs, and the Polygon Man advertisement posters.

Worthy of a Second Look

Author's Note: All copyrights for the images in this comic go to their respective owners.

Today marks the 30th Anniversary of the launch of the Sony PlayStation in Japan. While it was the video game console that revolutionized the video game industry and gave us Twisted Metal, Final Fantasy VII, PaRappa the Rapper, Crash Bandicoot, Spyro the Dragon, Tomb Raider, Metal Gear Solid, Klonoa and too many other franchises to name, we must also remember the forgotten gems of the original PlayStation because they also made this console the icon of video game history. Here are just five PS1 games that deserve a second look.

1. The Sunsoft Memorial Series: Remember the Famicom/NES games that were conceived by Sunsoft? In 2001 and 2002, Sunsoft ported twelve Famicom/NES games to the PS1 in a six-volume compilation known as the Sunsoft Memorial Series. The twelve Famicom/NES games in this compilation are Ikki, Super Arabian, Route-16 Turbo, Mystery of Atlantis, 53 Stations of the Tokaido, The Wing of Madoola, Blaster Master, Ripple Island, Journey to Silius/Raf World, Hebereke, Super Spy Hunter/Battle Formula and Mr Gimmick. Give these NES games a try if you miss the glory days of Sunsoft.

2. Jaleco Collection Volume 1: Jaleco was also involved in bringing Famicom/NES games to the PS1 as well. However, they stopped making these compilations after Volume 1. The games featured in this compilation are Argus, City Connection, Exerion, Field Combat, Formation Z, Ninja Jajamaru-Kun and Rod Land. If you miss the glory days of Jaleco, this compilation is a must-try.

3. The Arika Cardcaptor Sakura Trilogy: Did you know that Cardcaptor Sakura video games exist? In fact, Arika made three Cardcaptor Sakura games for the PS1, and one of them happens to be a Tetris game, so give it a try if you like Tetris as well.

4: Puyo Puyo BOX: This was the very last Puyo Puyo game to be developed by Compile before they handed over the Puyo Puyo rights to Sega. It was also the first PS1 game to be published by Sega, and it was released on the PS1 months before Sega discontinued the Dreamcast. Awkward, isn't it?

5. Metal Slug (PS1 Port): While Metal Slug is best remembered for being the Run-and-Gun title that gave the Neo Geo a second wind, we should also remember that the PS1 version of Metal Slug has another game mode called "Another Story". It can only be unlocked by winning the arcade game once. Free space on the PS1 Memory Card is also required for this mode. This mode has four minigames. If you complete it, it will unlock "Another Story II" after pressing R1+L2+O while the title screen cursor is on "Another Story".

With all that said, Happy 30th Anniversary, Sony PlayStation! Here's to the next 30 years!

Video Games that belong in a recycle bin

Author's Note: All copyrights for the items featured in this comic go to their respective owners.

Not all video games of yesteryear are worth collecting. Some of them are so horrendous that they should be dumped into an E-Waste recycle bin. Here are just seven games that were better off in a recycle bin.

Bubsy 3D: This infamous game caused the death of a mediocre mascot's career. Not even The Woolies Strike Back or Atari's acquisition of Bubsy could revive the franchise.

Awesome Possum: Definitely the worst Sega Genesis game in existence, although Instruments of Chaos starring Young Indiana Jones would have been its biggest rival for that disgraceful title.

Superman 64: A horrible Nintendo 64 game that tarnished the reputation of superhero video games.

Street Fighter (Amiga version): A terrible port of a mediocre arcade game, and Ken wasn't even in this port of the original Street Fighter.

Mortal Kombat Advance: Probably the worst game in the history of the Mortal Kombat series, although it would have to contend with the Game.com port of Mortal Kombat Trilogy for the worst game in Mortal Kombat history.

Escape From Bug Island: A game so bad that some shovelware titles for the Wii are better than this abomination. Even more insulting is the fact that this game was a launch title for the Wii in Japan.

Babylon's Fall: A dumpster fire that would make you want to shut your wallets on Square Enix. It was so horrible that the servers had to close down after less than a year, and when that announcement was made, video game stores wanted people to take it off their hands for free, meaning any thief who steals a copy of Babylon's Fall without getting arrested for theft will be left in despair when the servers closed its doors for good because Babylon's Fall is no longer playable after its servers closed down.

Voice Actress Audition

Author's Note: Given that I do not own Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth, I do not know if the Final Fantasy 7 Remake Trilogy production team gave Jenova a voice for that infamous quote where she taunts Cloud by saying "Because, you are... a puppet."

If Jenova had a voice actress, that voice actress would have to make the villainess sound menacing. Currently, the two best choices for Jenova's voice would be to either make her sound like the Evil Queen from the Animated Disney Snow White or to make her sound like a female version of Polygon Man. However, having no set form means it's almost impossible for Jenova to have a voice, which is why everything about Jenova is very unsettling, including her theme...

Swimming Pool Matriarch Visual Gag Variations 4

Once again, it's time for more wisdom from the Matriarch of the Swimming Pool.

Sephiroth's parents did say mean things to Cloud. Jenova does not speak. But when she did, she called Cloud "a puppet". Professor Hojo, the evil genius who happens to be Sephiroth's father, called Cloud "the Failure".

There are no traces of PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale in the PS5 built-in freeware Astro's Playroom. This also includes the complete absence of Polygon Man from the game. Instead, the final boss was the PS1 Tech Demo T-Rex, who just happens to have no game of his own before Astro's Playroom. Maybe PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale will get a Definitive Remaster one day, and hopefully, the Astro's Playroom stage will be included, with the PS1 Tech Demo T-Rex included as a stage hazard.

In Resident Evil 2, Dr William Birkin seeks to implant the G virus into his daughter Sherry Birkin. For that, the heroes had to kill him. As a result, Dr Birkin perished a mutated monster. But what made him so unlikeable was his obsession with implanting the G virus into his daughter. This means Dr William Birkin is a worse father than Tekken's Heihachi Mishima.

The art style of the SNES launch title F-Zero was reminiscent of superhero comic books. In fact, Captain Falcon's Falcon Punch would fit perfectly in any comic featuring onomatopoeia.

Toxic Fandoms

Even Groundskeeper Willie knows that the Street Fighter fandom has become very toxic. But he wouldn't like it if Principal Seymour Skinner calls Street Fighter fans a contentious people and would threaten Principal Skinner by saying that Ryu will hurl a Shinku Hadoken in his face for saying such words.

The Simpsons © FOX.

Even more Rare Gems from the Bargain Bin

The Atari 7800 was clearly underappreciated because it was actually the last good Atari console before the infamous Atari Jaguar, and was the best attempt by Atari to win back their customers after the North American Video Game Crash of 1983. Therefore, this underrated console from Atari would be a respectable find from the bargain bin, if they can be found in the bargain bin that is.

Who would have thought the original arcade version of Mortal Kombat would have gotten the Plug & Play treatment? Surely there are some people who would have tried to lay their hands on this piece of video game history if Mortal Kombat was not banned in whichever country they come from...

If you dislike the North American box art for Karnaaj Rally to the point you chose not to pick up a copy of the game, then you have not heard about the European box art for Karnaaj Rally, which was actually good box art design. Karnaaj Rally is actually a decent racing game for the Game Boy Advance. Therefore, ignore the awful box art and go get a copy of Karnaaj Rally from the bargain bin if you regretted your decision to give Karnaaj Rally a miss due to the bad box art.

Another underappreciated console that can be found in the bargain bin as a rare find is the PlayStation Vita. This was a handheld that cost more than the Nintendo 3DS even when these two handhelds had similar battery life. No wonder the 3DS outsold the Vita by a long shot. Gamers are becoming more thrifty as the effects of the 2008 downturn lingers on after 15 years.

PES 2014 was officially confirmed to be the last game released for the PlayStation 2, so you can expect this game to be a rare find in the bargain bin.

Redesigned versions of great consoles often get released near the start of the twilight years, and the original PlayStation was no exception. The PS One was released in 2000, the same year Sony released the Playstation 2. Therefore, expect to find a PS One in the bargain bin, although such an item will be a rarity.

Speaking of bargain bin rarities, Compile's last game, Pochi and Nyaa, is an uncommon PlayStation 2 game that can be found in the bargain bin. But it is not easy to find the PS2 version of Pochi and Nyaa in the Japanese video game store bargain bin because Pochi and Nyaa was Compile's very last game before they closed their doors for good.

Sony's Most Malevolent Character

If you want to know why PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale is not getting a sequel, this is because the various heroes, villains and other miscellaneous characters throughout the history of Sony's PlayStation successfully defeated the malevolent being that made them destroy each other so that he can get rid of them and become the sole mascot of PlayStation. We're talking about Polygon Man, the purple polygonal head that PlayStation creator Ken Kutaragi rejected at E3 1995. In the 17 years between that fateful rejection and the E3 2012 Trailer for PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale, Polygon Man became Sony's most malevolent character, driven by the bitterness that he had since being rejected by Ken Kutaragi. So malevolent that he even seeks to destroy the villains of PlayStation. But he just wishes to enslave everybody in order to destroy the PlayStation World and reforge it in his own image as payback for Ken Kutaragi's rejection.

Predictions for an Endgame Scenario

Author's Note: Currently, as at the time of this comic being published, Wooden Plank Studios' Kazuya Story Arc is still ongoing.

It all started with Sephiroth poisoning his guests at the E3 Dinner Party. Tekken's Kazuya Mishima managed to find Incineroar and Kirby still alive. However, he had to begin his quest to revive everyone who perished at the E3 Dinner Party. Why Sephiroth poisoned everyone remains unclear. However, it may have something to do with Sony not being at E3 2021. This could mean that the mastermind behind Sephiroth's mass poisoning was not only his mother Jenova, who is not quite dead despite being technically dead for thousands of years since the destruction of the Cetra, but Sony, the creators and owners of the PlayStation brand, could possibly have been involved in what appears to be an anti-Nintendo plot as well as an anti-Microsoft plot.

We have not reached the point where any of these endgame scenarios will happen yet. But the one where Sephiroth pulls a Tim Curry by quoting Cherdenko's quote of escaping his enemies, will reveal that Sony is the one place that hasn't been corrupted by Nintendo's tripe. All three possible endgame scenarios will involve the PlayStation characters turning their weapons against Sephiroth because he hurt the Sackboy's feelings.

It's possible Polygon Man was the true mastermind behind all of this. He disliked E3 ever since he was rejected by PlayStation creator Ken Kutaragi at E3 1995.

Update: None of my predictions were correct, but there was an Avengers: Endgame-style final battle between Kazuya's army and Sephiroth's army, and Kazuya's army emerged victorious because Kirby disabled Sephiroth's Jenova Cells with a Friend Heart, allowing Cloud and Joker to land a coup de grace on him. Once Sephiroth felt that could not stand punching Pichu, his army of villains disbanded, and he had to be Kazuya's prisoner. As for Jenova and Polygon Man, neither one showed up because they prefer to keep to the sidelines. It makes sense for Jenova because she was technically dead for thousands of years since the extinction of the Cetra people. In Polygon Man's case, he keeps to the sidelines even when you face him in the Boss Arena. The most the malevolent head could do is transform into stage hazards or slam on you like a Thwomp, which leaves him vulnerable to attack.

Now that Kazuya's Quest is over, Kazuya begins a new quest in the Paldea Region. Congratulations to Wooden Plank Studios for creating one of the longest story arcs in webcomic history!

Annual Online Sale

It's the annual 9.9 Sale, and e-commerce sites Shopee and Lazada are giving out special offers. However, the Sony PlayStation and the Sega Dreamcast are being left out of this annual special offer sale on their anniversary day. After all, who wants to celebrate milestone anniversaries of video game consoles that are no longer in production with a special offer sale?

Speaking of anniversaries, happy anniversary Sony PlayStation and Sega Dreamcast.

Farewell to old friends

Author's Note: This comic was conceived in response to Sony announcing the PlayStation 4 on the 20th of February, 2013. Time constraints mean that by the time this comic was completed, the PlayStation 4 was already available on retail for several years, while the PlayStation 3 is no longer in production. Now that Sony announced the PlayStation 5, this comic will be for commemorating Sony's PlayStation 5 announcement as well as the 25th anniversary of the original Sony PlayStation in all regions outside Japan.

For those wondering why Klonoa is the character saying his farewells to the PlayStation consoles in this comic, that's because the Klonoa series began on the PlayStation, and Klonoa was a prominent Namco character during the PlayStation 2 era. The dates in the first two panels are references to the discontinuation of the production of the PS1 in 2006 and the PS2 on the 4th of January, 2013. As for Klonoa frowning on the PS3 in the last two panels, it's not because the PS3 has no Klonoa titles, but the PS4 is not backwards compatible with its predecessors. Note that Klonoa is holding a PS3 Slim in the last two panels, and the date on the third panel is a reference to the day the PS4 was announced.

The PlayStation 5 will be backward compatible with most PS4 titles, but it will not be backward compatible with any game from the PS1, PS2 or PS3. Therefore, expect Klonoa to shun the PS5 for being backward compatible with the PS4 only, and totally leaving out the PS3, PS2 and PS1.

PlayStation at 25

It's unbelievable that Sony could create a video game console line that will last 25 years back in 1994. Nobody expected the PlayStation name to last 25 years, not even Sony. But the PlayStation name lasted through four video game console generations, and with PlayStation 5 possibly coming soon, the PlayStation line will possibly continue through the next generation of video game consoles.

Happy 25th Anniversary, Sony PlayStation! The video game industry would never be this big without you!

Nichitsu's Forgotten Consoles and Computers

A sad fate for these great gaming consoles and computers...

Nobody knows if the abandoned consoles and computers left behind in Nichitsu belonged to the last group of people who left the town for the last time or people who came to the ghost town and stayed there for a while.

Perhaps somebody will claim these retro treasures and give them a new home.