Monday, 30 November 2020

2006 Called


Credits to xkcd for the inspiration for this comic.

Who can remember the time when YouTube used to be great? What about MySpace being the dominant social media platform? What about the early years of Facebook? Or even the first Twitter accounts?

Of course, with 2020 being such a terrible year, we would miss 2006 a lot. There was New Super Mario Bros, Final Fantasy XII, the Sony PlayStation 3, the Nintendo Wii, RuneScape and Maple Story were competing for the Free-to-play MMORPG market, the short film "Kiwi!" was uploaded on YouTube, and a fantastic World Cup hosted by Germany that was sadly marred by a headbutt incident in the grand final between France and Italy.

However, amid the big soccer football party going on in Germany, one non-denominational branch of Christianity had been warning us about a far right movement that is growing in power. The football tournament had distracted us from this very important omen of the end times. The Philadelphia Church of God's The Trumpet magazine has already told us that eventually, despite the efforts of the good people of Germany to rein in a sinister evil, the rise of the Revelation 13 Beast is inevitable. In fact, YouTube is largely censored in Germany, with over 61% of videos being blocked on copyright grounds. In 2019, Germany's netizens staged a protest against the European Union Copyright Directive being applied to the internet. The protesters failed to prevent it from getting approved. The Trumpet magazine also condemned the European Union Copyright Directive getting approved, calling it one step closer to the rise of the Revelation 13 Beast. All of this could lead to the end of democracy in Germany, which will ultimately lead to the biggest war in human history. One that could result in humanity's extinction if Jesus does not return...

Now, in the 2020s, looking back to the mid-2000s can sometimes bring painful memories of what internet content that was uploaded in that time period used to look like.

Monday, 16 November 2020

Variations of a Metroid Ending Swimsuit


At the end of the original Metroid, be it the Japanese Famicom Disk System version or the international Nintendo Entertainment System version, the player will be greeted with a reveal that Samus is female, depending on how fast the player completed the game. The attire in the best ending happens to have Samus wear a bikini, and a beach setting would be a better background than the surface of Zebes.

The first image is obvious. The second is a reference to Super Metroid's standard Game Over sequence and the Best Ending, where Samus is wearing black undergarments. The third would be a homage to Metroid Fusion's ending outfit, while the fourth is based on Metroid: Zero Mission's ending outfit. Samus wearing a pink bikini in the fifth image has no Metroid references, but it could be a reference to Peach wearing a pink bikini in the Seaside Kingdom from Super Mario Odyssey. The sixth image is a reference to the creamed spinach green colour of the original Game Boy's screen. In the seventh image, Samus wears a striped bikini, referencing the popularity of shimabra and shimapan in Japanese pop culture, as well as the swimwear based on them. The last image has Samus wear an itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka-dot bikini to the beach, and she was not afraid to come outside.

Metroid © Nintendo.

Sunday, 15 November 2020

Poorly Designed Blouse


Remember the comic about the wardrobe malfunction? Who would have thought the blouses worn by the female enemies from The Astyanax would fall apart from getting slashed... You can say that poor design is to blame for the blouses falling apart from getting slashed by Roche...

The weapon in this comic is an iron two-handed sword from Old School Runescape, and slashing weapons such as Roche's axe are the reason the blouses worn by the female enemies from The Astyanax fall apart.

Saturday, 14 November 2020

Peace in our time 3


Author's Note: This comic was created to commemorate the launch of "Sliske's Endgame" and the quest's ending. Be warned, though, for this comic and the description below contains major spoilers.

Yes, Sliske was killed off by angry Runescape players who went to do this quest. However, it was revealed that the Elder God Jas was the mastermind behind all of Sliske's villainy, including the death of Guthix. Now that the Elder Gods have risen, the Prehistoric Abyssal's last words before he perished were actually true regarding the Elder Gods' rise bringing about the end of Gielinor as we know it.

Looks like Wahisietel is going to be happy to hear that Sliske is dead, because even villains such as Zamorak dislike Sliske to the point that Sliske must die.

Unfortunately, the peace that we got from killing Sliske is only temporary, because the Desperate Times and Desperate Measures quests came along, and it focused on the Elder Gods becoming the biggest threat to Gielinor to the point Kerapac had to take action his way. In other words, proclaiming "Peace in our time" is not a good idea after all...

Thursday, 12 November 2020

Peace in our time 2


Author's Note: This comic was made to commemorate Tuska's demise at the end of the "Tuska Comes" World Event in Runescape.

This is the second comic about the "Peace in our time" quote. Unfortunately, just like the Munich Agreement, the peace that came out of the deaths of Bandos, and in this comic's case, Tuska, were only temporary. Especially when the Elder Gods started to awaken at the end of the Heart of Stone quest. Maybe that was what attracted Tuska to Gielinor in the first place.

Wednesday, 11 November 2020

Annual Online Sale 2


Another comic about Shopee and Lazada having an annual sale? And it's on the eleventh day of the eleventh month? The only problem is that the recently released Command and Conquer Remastered Collection will not get a special discount on Veteran's Day whatsoever, unfortunately.

Happy Veteran's Day to all armed forces veterans of the Free World.

Tuesday, 10 November 2020

Peace in our time


Author's Note: This comic was made to commemorate Armadyl's victory over Bandos at the end of "The Bird and The Beast" World Event in Runescape.

The quote "Peace for our time" was often misquoted as "Peace in our time" and was a reference to the Munich Agreement. In this comic, the dialogue in the speech bubbles, including the "Peace in our time" quote, is a reference to the intro of Command and Conquer: Red Alert, where Albert Einstein went back in time to change the course of history.

Apparently, when Bandos died at the end of The Bird and The Beast, nobody mourned his demise. Not even his followers...

Thursday, 5 November 2020

The (Lost) Red Alert Reboot Script


Let's be honest. Command and Conquer: Red Alert will never be able to get a reboot, despite the success of Command and Conquer Remastered Collection. Electronic Arts had simply ruined the Command and Conquer series so much that it has been irreparably damaged.

For starters, Command and Conquer's Red Alert series was, contrary to popular belief, not really based on Cold War alternate history. Instead, it merely teaches us about the negative consequences of altering the space-time continuum. In fact, it could be possible that Dr Gregor Zelinsky was informed about the negative consequences of altering the space-time continuum by Nikola Tesla, the man who conceived the Tesla Coil that became an icon of the Red Alert storyline.

Assuming that the one who wanted to delete the tyrant who started World War 2 for the sake of a better future was not some physics genius, but rather, somebody from the Warsaw Pact, it would result in a bloodier and more brutal version of the Cold War.

MapleStory and Gunbound are two games that originated from South Korea, so it would make sense for the South Korean armed forces to draw inspiration from these games. Unfortunately, in practice, an army that draws inspiration from MapleStory and Gunbound will not be able to survive a Cold War alternate history setting where the Warsaw Pact and their allies have Tesla Coils, double-barreled tanks, airships that drop bombs that have more than half the destructive power of the MOAB, and infantrymen who can use guerrilla tactics.

Yugoslavia was a Serbian-dominated federation of Balkan states, and Nikola Tesla was born in what is now modern-day Serbia. In our timeline, Serbia fought alongside Russia against Germany for two World Wars, and during the Yugoslav era, was a staunch ally of Soviet Russia. Therefore, it makes sense for the Tesla Coil to be deployed as a weapon by the Soviets.

As far as plot twists go, Germany will be the country that betrays the Allied Nations and their allies. This betrayal will ironically anger even the German people because there are people in Germany who are currently warning us about their country being a greater threat than some other warmongering rogue dictator. This is because Germany was the country where the authors of The Communist Manifesto were born, as well as where The Communist Manifesto was first written. Even worse is that Germany smuggled a pro-communist exile out of Switzerland to foment unrest in Russia during World War 1. In our timeline, Germany is forcing the EU to implement their regulations upon the whole world that entire countries are forced to plagiarise EU regulations. Germany's attempt to enforce their will upon the earth was actually predicted by a denomination of Christianity that is currently speaking the inconvenient truth, including America's decline.

A homage to Red Alert 3, in which one conscript says "Neutrality, huh? Switzerland, please explain massive Allied military base!" will get referenced when one of the Soviet conscripts will question Japan's pacifist policy.

The Pusan Perimeter was the turning point where the tide turned in favour of NATO and its allies during the Korean Peninsula's civil war. Of course one of these Allied missions will revisit that plot of land, where the Allies and their allies must chase the Soviet forces out of the Pusan Perimeter.

A reference to Dr Gregor Zelinsky will involve a Soviet scientist either defecting to the Allies to tell the truth about altering the space-time continuum or he will tell the truth to the Soviet Commander that the laws of the space-time continuum had been violated.

Yes, Jerusalem had been totally destroyed before, as recorded in the Bible. But it was never wiped off the map despite the two cases of the city's total destruction. The Soviet Campaign will end with the Soviets seizing control of a Jerusalem that had been burnt to the ground as a result of the massive final battle. However, a remnant of the Allies will escape by a time machine, referencing potential sequel hooks. Similar to the Soviet ending of Red Alert 3, where the player becomes leader of the Soviet Union, and by extension, the entire world, the Soviet ending for the Red Alert reboot will have the player become the president of Russia, and by extension, the whole Earth.

This "lost" script, unfortunately, does not even exist. But if it did, it could be a reference to all the cut content that never got implemented in the Command and Conquer games.

Tuesday, 3 November 2020

Samsung's Forgotten Icon


Ever since Samsung's current logo was first introduced in 1993, Samsung had risen to become a South Korean icon since then. The company had manufactured many products, including TV sets, computers and cellphones to name a few. They also had a license to manufacture Sega consoles as well. The Nuon DVD Player, while also a Samsung product, was a short-lived gaming platform that could not live up to its full potential, however, and it failed to become an icon of the South Korean company. But this was not Samsung's fault, however, as VM Labs, the company that conceived the Nuon platform, faced a lot of problems. In addition to a poorly managed marketing campaign, the Nuon faced tougher competition from Sony's PlayStation 2, which happens to be able to play DVDs. It didn't help that the Nuon's graphics were comparable to the PS1 and N64 when the market was bracing itself for the PS2.

In the end, the Nuon was discontinued in 2003, and VM Labs was acquired by Genesis Microchip who in turn, was acquired by ST Microelectronics. The Nuon ended up being merely a footnote in the history of Samsung. From Samsung's perspective, the Nuon was a commercial failure. But at least its failure was nowhere near as bad as the Samsung Galaxy Note 7 and its exploding batteries...

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