Author's Note: All copyrights for the characters in this comic go to their respective owners.
The warzones of Command and Conquer: Red Alert have no place for pathetic weaklings. Here are five weaklings who should never be in such warzones.
France's biggest loser needs no introduction whatsoever. Glass Joe has an abysmal 99 losses according to his lore in the Punch-Out series. If he were to fight in the Red Alert trilogy's version of the Cold War, even a cheap conscript would easily mow him down in personal combat.
As the weakest character in the Street Fighter series, Dan Hibiki was always destined to be weak. He's not as weak as Glass Joe, but still, he will get mowed down by conscripts...
Bubsy's catchphrase of "What could possibly go wrong?" will end up becoming self-fulfilling if this Bobcat were to be fighting in a Cold War gone hot because he will end up angering Soviet Russia's huskies and War Bears, resulting in him getting eaten up by them.
While Spelunker has bombs and an Uzi, these weapons will mean nothing when falling from a height of one meter means instant death. Therefore, Spelunker would be dead if he was to fight in the Red Alert warzones...
Wynn already has too many enemies and hazards that would knock him dead in one hit in his own game. If this fragile protagonist were to be posted to the Red Alert warzones, he would definitely be a goner despite being armed with bombs.
TL;DR, if these weaklings went to the Red Alert warzones, all of them are guaranteed to be goners.
