Tuesday 23 January 2024

No Pineapples on Pizzas, Please


500 posts on this blog? Can you believe it? We are almost at 500 comics! Get ready for that major milestone!

Pineapples taste good, and so do pizzas. However, despite pineapple pizzas having a good taste, pineapples should not have been pizza toppings in the first place. Even if you were not an Italian or a master chef like Gordon Ramsey, you should know very well that combining the acidity of pineapples and tomatoes will damage the structural integrity of the pizza slices. Therefore, pineapples do not belong on pizzas.

Monday 22 January 2024

Swiss Lake Navy


Did you know that Switzerland has a navy? That's right. The Swiss Navy exists, and their purpose is to patrol the lakes of Switzerland, as well as serve in a search and rescue role.

Unfortunately, the Swiss Navy's existence has been largely ignored to the point Switzerland does not get any representation in the Daisenryaku series at all. EA developer Greg Black wanted Switzerland to be the third faction in Red Alert 3, but this proposal got rejected, possibly because of the same reasons Switzerland got rejected from the Daisenryaku series by Systemsoft Beta.

Sunday 21 January 2024

25 Years of Smash


Can you believe it? 25 years? The original Super Smash Bros for the Nintendo 64 turns 25 today?!? If you had memories of this game, then you really have nostalgia.

What started out as a project called "Dragon King: The Fighting Game" became a huge sensation. It had one type of playable character, but that unnamed character became the basis for Captain Falcon's moveset in the Super Smash Bros games. Even the running gag involving Team Rocket getting defeated by being sent blasting off again in the Pokemon TV series was incorporated into the Super Smash Bros games as the Star KO death animation.

If the Super Smash Bros series was a war, it would have lasted longer than the two World Wars combined. Some people claim that the war that began when Super Smash Bros was first released a few months after the launch of Mario Party was the result of Mario Party's launch. Maybe that's why Mario Party was nicknamed "The Destroyer of Friendships". The World of Nintendo was plunged into war as a result of the very first Mario Party game, and that war has grown bigger since then. The rest, as they say, is history.

Happy 25th Anniversary, Super Smash Bros! Here's to another 25 years!

Nintendo games and characters © Nintendo.

Friday 19 January 2024

Australia When Tekken 8 Launches


Credits to Tumblr user Jake-Clark for providing the template for this comic.

Just one more week until Tekken 8's launch. Until then, Get Ready For The Next Battle!

Tekken 8 is launching on 26th of January, 2024. 26th of January is also Australia Day. This means 2024 will have one of the best Australia Day celebrations ever because Australian Tekken fans will be laying their hands on Tekken 8 when it comes out.

Thursday 18 January 2024

The End of the Democratic Age


It's depressing that we are officially in the End Times. The Russo-Ukrainian War, the Middle East Crisis, tensions between the Democratic World and the People's Republic of China over Taiwan, the unfinished civil war in the Korean Peninsula threatening to reignite, and the resurgence of fascism in Europe that is all but going unnoticed. All of them are indicators that the End Times are just around the corner. Unfortunately, many of us are denying this truth. Why? Because the ultimate liar has deceived us all. He wants us to remain in denial. That liar, however, is feeling depressed because he is going to be kicked out of his throne forever and is going to be imprisoned in the bottomless pit for 1000 years. As for the tyrants and terrorists, they are going to be turned into rivers of blood when they confront the Christ at the Battle of the Great Day of the Lord Almighty. But that's not all. The very worst of humanity will be forced to renounce their wickedness in a bonus level known as the Great White Throne Judgement. If you do not renounce your wickedness, you fail that bonus level and it's off to the Lake of Hellfire, where contrary to popular belief, you do not get tortured for eternity. Instead, your very existence gets obliterated. As for the Evil One, he will be tortured for eternity in the Lake of Hellfire before he gets deported to Outer Darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth. Nobody, not even a rogue dictator, would want to be cast out into Outer Darkness, because that place is worse than the Lake of Hellfire.

Wednesday 17 January 2024

Victory At Unknown Cost


James Carter Cathcart has survived 2023 by defeating throat cancer, but he has been forced to retire as a result. In other words, he has ended up being like Wario in this comic. And yes, that is Wario's losing pose in Mario Party 8. Now that Cathcart has been forced to retire, who will voice Professor Oak's grandson Gary, as well as Team Rocket's James and Meowth? Maybe it will be Wario's new voice actor Kevin Afghani? Who knows?

Mario Party 8 © Nintendo.

Tuesday 16 January 2024

Different Destroyer Classes with the same name


Apparently, the United States Navy's two different versions of the Farragut-class destroyers were not the only instance of a ship class having the same name. Sweden has also done that with their submarine classes. In fact, Sweden had two different versions of the Hajen-class submarine as well as two different versions of the Draken-class submarine that they had to name the two different Hajen-classes as the Hajen II-class and Hajen III-class, and the two Draken-classes were known as the Draken I-class and Draken II-class. As for why there was no Hajen I-class submarine, that's because the first HSwMS Hajen was actually an individual submarine.

Monday 15 January 2024

Swimming Pool Matriarch Visual Gag Variations 3


Once again, it's time for another Matriarch of the Swimming Pool visual gag variations comic.

Can you believe it's been 2 weeks since Steamboat Willie entered the Public Domain? Guess Disney had finally thrown in the towel and let the cartoon that marked the debut of Mickey Mouse go into the Public Domain, in what could well be the greatest victory for Fair Use.

Is it really a coincidence that Wii Party U and Wii Fit U both came out in Japan on the same day? Not really. According to several sources, the Japanese release dates of Wii Party U and Wii Fit U were stated to be on 31 October 2013.

If you have watched the Legend of Zelda TV series, you would have known that one of the show's 13 episodes, "Fairies in the Spring", is a water park episode, which happens to be the only time where Zelda is officially seen wearing a swimsuit. Since then, Zelda hasn't been seen in swimwear outside of fan art.

LG used to be one of the manufacturers of the 3DO video game console. After the 3DO was discontinued, LG stopped making video game consoles for all markets.

Some professional chefs who are not Italian have officially confirmed that pineapples should not be pizza toppings at all.

Did you know that Germany once operated MiG-29 fighter jets? When the Federal Republic assimilated East Germany, the Luftwaffe inherited East Germany's MiG-29s. Then Germany sold their MiG-29s to Poland for €1 per aircraft. This sounds ironic given that Germany was Poland's biggest enemy in World War 2, as well as stupid, especially when MiG-29s were among the best Russian-made fighter jets. But it's not. Selling military hardware for symbolic prices is merely to clear up your inventory of equipment that you no longer have any use for. Therefore, it makes sense that Germany wants to be rid of Soviet-era equipment by selling them off for ludicrously low prices because Germany no longer has any use for them.

Sunday 14 January 2024

Denouncing Leftist Lies


There's a good reason leftists hate arrogant jerks who want to humiliate them. The leftists clearly smell of mental illness, and the arrogant jerks who dislike leftists know it.

Leftism and socialism were definitely not good, and it's not just in Poland. Look at many of the countries that have embraced leftism and socialism. Leftism promised equality. Socialism promised free healthcare and housing. But both of them have lied. If the United States of America and other Anglosphere countries saw the true extent of the damage leftism had done to the countries that have embraced socialism, they would have opened their eyes and decide to side with the arrogant jerk Donald Trump. Even Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu wants the Trump back in the White House. Then the leftists will finally get humiliated for trying to establish a socialist tyranny where freedom of speech is forbidden.

Saturday 13 January 2024

Discount Sale Items that are hard to find


When it comes to discount sales in 2024, great items from yesteryear are now hard to find. Some good examples would be discontinued consoles from Atari and Sega, as well as Plug & Play consoles, HVC-101 Famicoms and even Eastern European Famiclones such as Poland's Pegasus. Then again, console redesign models such as the Atari 2600 Jr, HVC-101 Nintendo Famicom, New-Style Nintendo Entertainment System and Sega Genesis 3 are going to be easier to find in a discount sale due to being late in the market. So if you do not mind buying redesigned consoles at a discount sale, now may be your last chance to do so, and time is running out.

Friday 12 January 2024

Ice Bucket Challenge 10th Anniversary Edition


2024 marks the 10th Anniversary of the Ice Bucket Challenge that went viral. Unfortunately, the people who inspired the Challenge, namely Anthony Senerchia Jr, Pete Frates and Pat Quinn, are dead. This means the Ice Bucket Challenge 10th Anniversary Edition will be dedicated to the memory of these three people as well as SpongeBob SquarePants creator Stephen Hillenburg, all of whom have died from ALS-related complications.

For those wondering if the two ladies in this comic are going to wear swimsuits for the Ice Bucket Challenge, the answer is yes. In fact, the swimsuits worn by Peach, Daisy, Rosalina and Samus would be among some of the best choices for the two ladies who want to look good after getting wet in the Ice Bucket Challenge.

If you want to know why swimwear and ice buckets go hand in hand, read my other two Ice Bucket Challenge-themed comics.

Nintendo games and characters © Nintendo.

Thursday 11 January 2024

The Truth About Camp Kidney


Credits to SrGrafo for providing the template for this comic.

At the end of the Camp Lazlo episode "Lumpus's Last Stand", it was finally revealed that Scoutmaster Lumpus was an impostor all along. This resulted in Scoutmaster Lumpus getting arrested, never to be seen or heard of again. Talk about a disappointing series finale...

Wednesday 10 January 2024

Maginot Line Overconfidence


Do you want to know why Germany achieved victory in the the Battle of France in 1940 in just 46 days? It was not because the Schlieffen Plan got remastered as the Manstein Plan, nor the successful breaching of the Maginot Line in the "Operation Tiger" offensive (Yes, Germany did try to breach the Maginot Line, and actually succeeded in doing so). The real truth about how Germany won the Battle of France in 1940 can be found in the book "The Strange Defeat" by Professor Marc Bloch. You might want to read it to understand how Germany vanquished a foe who could have inflicted 1 million German casualties. The author blames France's leadership during the interwar years for being unable to foresee German rearmament and goes on to say that France's leadership during the start of the war was disastrous. If all of this was true, then Germany's victory in the Battle of France was due to their opponents' lack of willpower, and not through brilliant tactics and strategies.

Tuesday 9 January 2024

Medieval War Crimes 2


If there was anybody who should be found guilty for giving England the orders to burn Joan of Arc alive, it's the Great False Church that accused the Cathars and the Knights Templar for heresy. After all, England did not want to execute Joan of Arc when they took her prisoner. But when she was eventually found guilty of heresy, England had no choice but to burn her at the stake. This resulted in Anglo-French relations being so bad, they only put their differences aside when they had to crush the Boxer Rebellion in China in 1900, and later on, go on a warpath against Germany in two World Wars, and then find themselves pitted against Russia and its client states during the Cold War. But still, France has not forgiven England for the death of Joan of Arc, even up until this modern era. Perhaps they will forgive each other when Christ eliminates the Great False Church that instructed England to burn Joan of Arc to death in the first place.

Monday 8 January 2024

Medieval War Crimes


Let's face it. A Great False Church made France slaughter Cathars for heresy. Also, this Great False Church allowed a cash-strapped France to manipulate them so they can instruct France to declare war on the Order of the Knights Templar using accusations of heresy and France's financial difficulties as an excuse. As a result, Catharism and the Order of the Knights Templar have ceased to exist. However, this Great False Church is going to be judged for all their crimes against anyone who they think were heretics by a God who, despite being capable of forgiving even the worst of humanity, will severely punish this Great False Church. Once this great false church is judged harshly, the Knights Templar, the Cathars, and everyone else who had been wronged by the Great False Church, including God's True Church, will finally have the justice that has long eluded them.

Sunday 7 January 2024

Confusion Crisis


Author's Note: This comic used a popular meme template from the Halo machinima series Red vs Blue about somebody being deceived.

How confusing is Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle? The confusion levels are definitely worse than that of Kingdom Hearts.

What if it turns out Sakura Kinomoto's magical girl escapades were the result of the backstory in Chapter 200 of Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle? For those who have read Chapter 220, it turns out Clow Reed's careless wish was responsible for the events of Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle, which in turn lead to the events of Cardcaptor Sakura. It just so happens Sakura Kinomoto was willing to lend a hand to Princess Sakura to return to Clow Country by any means possible. This means Sakura Kinomoto is no different from any magical girl with past lives. All of this confusion, however, is Fei Wong Reed's fault in the first place. His death seal tearing apart Princess Sakura resulted in Nadeshiko freezing time and dying for it. This resulted in the heroes going on a quest to restore Princess Sakura's memory and uncover her true identity. But this resulted in the creation of many paradoxes. In other words, Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle is so confusing that Magical Girl Anime fans have indeed been tricked and bamboozled.

Halo © Microsoft. Red vs Blue © Rooster Teeth.

Saturday 6 January 2024

Too Grotesque for Polygon Man


Credits to The Archworks a.k.a. Archemeits for his renditions of Heretic Hojo and Jenova Synthesis.

"Ridley is too big" has officially aged poorly. "Jenova is too ugly" makes more sense for the Smash community now, because Jenova is far too grotesque to even have any part in the malevolent plans of Polygon Man, one of which involves the purple head taking over Sony.

Heretic Hojo and Jenova Synthesis are so ugly that Polygon Man rejected them from being stage hazards in PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale. And it does not help when both of them are uglier than the Chimera from the Resistance series. This could also explain why neither Hojo nor Jenova came along when Sephiroth entered Super Smash Bros Ultimate. Sakurai would find both of them too grotesque to be included in any form.

Friday 5 January 2024

When Commies Were Worse Than Jerks...


In episode 8 of the Pachinko TV series, we get introduced to villains worse than the Japanese fascists who want to turn Japan into a warmongering rogue state administered by a tyrannical regime that has friendly relations with the Hitler-Mussolini Axis responsible for World War 2, and the Japanese upper class who, by being arrogant jerks, may have been the inspiration for Ash Ketchum's original nemesis Gary Oak. We're talking about the Japanese communists. They wanted voters to vote for them in elections, and they influenced Koreans in Japan to join their cause. It just so happens that Isak was arrested for allegedly sympathizing with both Japanese and Korean communists, both of whom are classified as severe threats to Japan in the 1930s. While Russian and Chinese communists did contribute to the bitter division of the Korean Peninsula that continues to this day, we must not forget that Japanese communists influenced Korean communism as well.

Thursday 4 January 2024

What to do when visiting Canada


Canada sounds like a great place to visit during winter, if winters were not harsh or miserable, that is.

If you played World of Warships or War Thunder, you do know that one of the ships featured in both games is HMCS Haida, a Canadian Tribal-class destroyer that served in World War 2 and the Korean War. For those who like to visit museum ships, pay a visit to HMCS Haida when you visit Canada.

Canada is known for its winter sports, most notably Ice Hockey. So you might want to go to Canada if you want to watch NHL ice hockey matches, especially when Canadian NHL teams win a lot of Stanley Cups.

The CN Tower is the tallest building in Canada, and yes, it's the one in Toronto. You might want to get a good view of Toronto from the main observation level if you do buy the tickets to go in, unless you are afraid of heights just like me.

Canada during winter is a great place for snowboarding and snowmobiling. Also, you might want to see the Aurora Borealis. It's a great lightshow in the Great White North.

For those wondering who Jonathan Burton is, he is the man behind the CarbotAnimations YouTube channel that is known for animated videos about Blizzard's games. So you may want a Blizzard-related plushie with his autograph on it.

With all that said, enjoy your visit to Canada, or if you're Canadian, reinvigorate your love for all things Canadian.

Wednesday 3 January 2024

Natural Sightseeing Sceneries


Why are we fascinated with nice scenery? Maybe it's because of the tranquility.

You do know that the place where Windows XP's Bliss wallpaper comes from is known for being a vineyard. Of course scenery sightseers will like that place. It has always been a historic landmark due to Microsoft's Windows XP.

When it comes to great Italian scenery, olive groves are definitely among them. Just as vineyards are associated with wine, olive groves are associated with olive oil, and Italy is known for having great wine and great olive oil.

For those wondering whether maple trees exist in South Korea, the answer is yes. Maple trees do exist in South Korea. Therefore, MapleStory originating from South Korea makes a lot of sense.

Nothing defines great Japanese scenery like cherry blossoms. The have always been synonymous with springtime in Japan. Maybe that's why Anime likes cherry blossoms a lot.

Pine forests exist all over the Northern parts of the Earth, and Sweden is one of those places. In fact, Swedish pine forests are synonymous with great Swedish scenery, and quite possibly the wooden furniture you can find in IKEA.

With all that said, sightseers should take this opportunity to visit these scenic places before they're gone.

Tuesday 2 January 2024

Surprising Discovery


While Pokemon fans obsess over theories about Ash's Coma, doctors, however, found out that mental illnesses can cause a state of consciousness similar to a coma. This means that the late Takeshi Shudo's proposed series finale where Pokemon was the dying dream of a mentally ill Ash makes more sense now. Talk about a depressing series finale...

Monday 1 January 2024

The Fate of Belgium


This. Is. It. 2024 is here. The year Belgium had been fearing since the 2019 federal elections has finally begun. The question is, if Wallonia and Flanders go separate ways, will the breakup of Belgium be as peaceful as the breakup of Czechoslovakia? Or will it be as violent as the breakup of Yugoslavia? What will happen to a nation known for chocolates, waffles, Brussels sprouts, Tintin and Smurfs when it goes to the polls for what could potentially be the last time?

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