Foolishness of God

You were expecting a comic about Resurrection Sunday to be uploaded. But it was a comic about why April Fools' Day needs to be abolished that got uploaded instead.

April Fools' Day was a mistake because there is nothing good about foolishness, and this was explicitly stated in the Bible. The foolishness of God, however, is wiser than men. But April Fools' Day has nothing to do with the foolishness of God because it was never the result of the foolishness of God. Therefore, April Fools' Day should be abolished because it is one of the fruits of the confusion this world has been afflicted with.

Exposing the Emissions Cartel

You were expecting a comic about Good Friday or crucifixion. But it was a comic about German consumers being angry at the corporate greed of their country's automakers that got uploaded instead.

Did you know that BMW, Mercedes-Benz, Volkswagen, Audi and Porsche were accused of operating a "car cartel" as far back as the 1990s? Despite being arch-rivals, these German automakers have been revealed to be secretly working together to deceive American environmental agencies. All of this was part of the German industrialists' post-war plan to conquer the global economy. Unfortunately, German consumers have seen this deception, and are now furious at such anti-consumer business practices. This is the "Dieselgate" scandal, and German consumers have joined hands with American consumers to boycott Volkswagen in protest against anti-consumer business practices.

However, that is nothing compared to the German business leaders' corporate greed being responsible for the Second Reich instigating World War 1 and the Third Reich instigating World War 2. This means Kaiser Wilhelm II as well as Adolf Hitler and the Nazis were pawns of a shadow government all along. Even without mentioning these people, Angela Merkel revealed this truth on the day she stepped down as chancellor of Germany.

Sadly, the corporate greed that made Germany start two World Wars will also bring about a third World War. One that will bring the Anglosphere and Israel to their knees for being very wayward, and will threaten to turn the Earth into a tohu and bohu hellscape where no flesh is saved alive. Thankfully, Christ will come again, and he will free Germany from the corporate greed that brought misery to millions of people worldwide.

In conclusion, Germany's brand of corporate greed should be locked up in prison. Period.

Meet the Original Characters

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the moment you have been waiting for. The Neo Retro Union Original Characters' names have been revealed, and they are going to be introduced in the style of the "Meet the Team" series from Team Fortress 2.

The names of the Neo Retro Union Original Characters are: Red Cap, Major Duncan, Captain Rodney, Oberon, Blondette, Brunetta, Turquoise, Amethyst, Magenta, and Sabriel.

Red Cap: A huge fan of SNK franchises, mostly The King of Fighters and Metal Slug. His main inspiration was Terry Bogard, and he believes that freedom and justice must prevail.

Major Duncan: An Army officer who, like Red Cap, believes that freedom and justice must prevail. Inspired by the heroes of Contra and Metal Slug.

Captain Rodney: A Navy captain who remembers the glory days of naval warfare from 1904 to 1991. He is a friend of Major Duncan, is named after the battleship HMS Rodney, and inspired by Captain Haddock from Tintin.

Oberon: A sailor who serves Captain Rodney. He is named after the submarine HMS Oberon, which in turn was named after the fairy king from William Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream.

Blondette: A friend of Red Cap who likes magical girls, and believes that freedom and justice must prevail. She was aptly named because of her blonde hair.

Brunetta: Blondette's brunette friend and another friend of Red Cap. Also likes magical girls.

Turquoise: The Matriarch of the Swimming Pool. Her name was due to her turquoise hair. She is friends with Red Cap, Blondette and Brunetta. Another fan of magical girls.

Amethyst: She was named after a semi-precious gemstone due to her purple hair. Loosely based on Gradriel from Princess Crown as well as Crispy Toast Original Character Leilanie. Likes gems because she was named after a gemstone. Likes magical girls as well.

Magenta: Her pink hair makes her a big fan of Rit from Rod Land and Soldam. She used to be afraid of being seen in skimpy swimwear until she met Turquoise. She likes magical girls and her friends include Red Cap, Blondette, Brunetta, Turquoise and Amethyst.

Sabriel: Named after the titular heroine of a Garth Nix novel. Like Blondette, Brunetta, Turquoise, Amethyst and Magenta, she likes magical girls. She misses the glory days that was the 1990s. But so do the other characters.

All of these characters have one thing in common. They believe that the Holy Bible was the greatest instruction manual ever written, and they believe that justice is important. If you want to redraw them as actual human characters, feel free to do so.

Manasseh the Forgetful

In Hebrew, Manasseh means "causing to forget" or "one who forgets". Also, Joseph's son Manasseh was believed to be the ancient progenitor of the American people. The sad part is that the distant descendants of the lost tribe of Manasseh have lost their memory as well. This is very dangerous for America because the United States of America is possibly that great nation that was established by the descendants of Manasseh according to Genesis 48:19.

Half-Life Disappointment

Isn't it disappointing that we will never get Half-Life 2: Episode 3 and Half-Life 3 at all? It gets even more disappointing when you come to the realization that not only was Gordon Freeman not the most important character despite being the player's character, but the most important character, Eli Vance, died at the end of Half-Life 2: Episode 2. With all that said, Steam users would rather hear the disappointing news about Half-Life 3 being cancelled than to be left in the dark over the fate of Half-Life 3. If Half-Life 3's cancellation was confirmed, Steam users will understand, and they can finally go back to their lives. Talk about a huge disappointment.

The Sour Rivalry

America's miraculous victory over Japan in the Pacific Theater of World War 2 would not have been possible if not for the sour rivalry between the Imperial Japanese Army and the Imperial Japanese Navy. This toxic inter-service rivalry within the Japanese camp allowed America and Britain to pick up the pieces after a string of defeats and hit back with a vengeance. Even after Japan surrendered, the insane rivalry between the Imperial Japanese Army and the Imperial Japanese Navy continued until the Allies ordered both of them to be disbanded altogether.

In conclusion, do not trust World War 2 Daisenryaku games where you fight as the Empire of Japan against the Allies because the Daisenryaku series does not take into account the leadership dysfunction of any faction.

Voice Actress Audition

Author's Note: Given that I do not own Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth, I do not know if the Final Fantasy 7 Remake Trilogy production team gave Jenova a voice for that infamous quote where she taunts Cloud by saying "Because, you are... a puppet."

If Jenova had a voice actress, that voice actress would have to make the villainess sound menacing. Currently, the two best choices for Jenova's voice would be to either make her sound like the Evil Queen from the Animated Disney Snow White or to make her sound like a female version of Polygon Man. However, having no set form means it's almost impossible for Jenova to have a voice, which is why everything about Jenova is very unsettling, including her theme...